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The Growing Pains of Letting People Go

It is most definitely scary. The whole point of growing pains is that they DO hurt. Like, a lot. The thing is, we are supposed to outgrow what no longer serves us. In this process though, your favorite shirt is thinning and no longer wearable, your favorite pair of shoes, which have been with you in all your adventures, no longer fit. Sometimes you even lose or break those items that have been with you at your worst and also at your best. People are like that in a way. We stop seeing eye to eye and, instead, communicate mutely in a desperate cry for holding on. Holding on to those memories and that comfort that is so familiar at this point.

Change is painful, because we outgrow what we have known and cared for so long, but this doesn’t mean it’s still helping us move forward.

I have had great loss this year in many, many shapes. A long relationship, a warm home, a childhood friend, a daily routine even. Along with all that, I also outgrew a part of me that was desperate to finally be put to rest. The greatest loss is to leave behind a version of yourself you held on to for a long time, but that is also the best part of it. What happens when you perform a funeral to yourself? Well, that’s just the beginning of everything else.

Have you ever noticed sometimes you stop synchronizing with specific people? You try to make plans and they just don’t ever come to fruition. Maybe you keep texting someone and they are genuinely always busy. Or maybe every time you’re in town to visit, they are not. Whatever the case may be, you are just not in the same page, no matter how hard you try. It’s interesting to see how everything around you starts changing even when you don’t try at all. The thing is, you are the one changing. Always. Whether you like it or not. Life will make you transmute and it will shake out whatever it is you don’t need anymore. Sometimes that means people and that’s okay.

It’s okay to not be in the same frequency as someone else.

Even if you used to “vibe” very well at one point, everyone comes into our life for a reason and purpose and to teach us something, in the same way we come into people’s lives as well. After all, we all experience every day from our own point of view, our own perception, and our very specific experiences. We never truly see anything or anyone from a neutral point of view. Again, that’s okay. It is also okay to choose to let go of someone who simply doesn’t synch very well with your spark. What I mean by “spark”, is the fire that moves you every single day, the reason you are here today. It’s great to keep different people around us to always learn and expand, but that spark is our essence in a way. Whoever strips that essence away or even extinguishes it a little bit, is not worth your energy and beauty. No matter what or who it is. The history you have together does not make up for how they make you feel in the present. Most of the time, all those years of building and nurturing this relationship are meant to teach you a lot about yourself. Even though growing together creates a very special and strong bond, the strongest one you should ever care for is the one with yourself. These changes also mean new people, new bonds, and new adventures. And that, my friend, is also okay.


Stay Updated!

Thanks, darling.


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